THE DISAPPEARING DUNG BEETLE 4

THE DISAPPEARING DUNG BEETLE (Prt 4 Cont.)

Act 1; Scene 1 (Cont.)

JEREMY
Which half?

CHELSEA
That, you'll have to figure out.

Jeremy looks around.

JEREMY
We should make the bed.  Where do you keep the clean sheets?

CHELSEA
Staying?

JEREMY
I got nothing better to do.

CHELSEA
Hall closet.

JEREMY
Huh?

CHELSEA
Clean sheets.

JEREMY
I got the job?

CHELSEA
Looks that way.

Jeremy extends his hand.  Chelsea stares at it.

CHELSEA
I can't.

JEREMY
Put up your hand.

CHELSEA
What?

JEREMY
Go ahead.

Chelsea raises her hand.

JEREMY
Gesture only.

They motion as if they are shaking hands, but never touch.

BLACK OUT

ACT ONE, SCENE 2:
Lights at half.  Chelsea steps to center and into her special pool of light.

CHELSEA
(To the audience)
Polarized light is when light waves vibrate in specific directions.  Unpolarized light waves vibrate in all directions, but polarized light waves vibrate only in one single specific direction.  

Predators make the world unsafe, some have six legs, some four and some two... despite their design, they are all the same.  Predators can rob you, kill you, take over your living space and... worse... Insects just like humans, over the years have developed defenses.  If they can't out-fight or overpower their predators sometimes their instincts will "out think" their predators.  After being devoured, maimed, robbed and murdered, their minds devise some of the most brilliant defenses that over millions of years are now instinctual.

(The set is re-arranged so that the door is now downstage left and the desk and kitchen area are at the end of the stage with the bed at upstage.)

CHELSEA
(To the audience)
Tiger moths can detect ultrasonic echolocations of bats.  The bats have radar, so the moths developed anti-radar and can out maneuver a bat by changing their pattern like a jet fighter.  Soldier Termites have nozzle like heads that are equipped with a defensive gland that can shoot a cocktail of chemicals at an intruder that will irritate and immobilize.

Chelsea sits on the edge of the stage.

CHELSEA
(Still to the audience)
The Dung Beetle owes its survival to the moon.

Chelsea moves closer to the audience.

CHELSEA
Gathering its primary source of nutrition into a ball, the Dung Beetle laboriously pushes the ball to a safe place.  Its new home.  On moonlit nights they navigate by sensing "polarization patterns" in lunar rays scattered by the earth's atmosphere.  A primal G.P.S. system or the first description of an animal using the moon as a nocturnal compass.

She stands and crosses to her desk.

CHELSEA
(Still to the audience.)
Guided home on a moonbeam, safe from predators.  Safe at home.

FADE TO BLACK

ACT 1, SCENE 3:
Chelsea is seated at her desk.  Jeremy enters.  He has a plastic container and is wearing rubber gloves with a hospital mask around his neck.

JEREMY
(Very straight faced)
I have the sample.

Chelsea says nothing and does not look up.

JEREMY
This is the most disgusting thing I've ever had to do.

Chelsea still says nothing.

JEREMY
Twelve.  Twelve burrowing holes.

Chelsea takes a book, sits down and starts to read.  Jeremy goes to the door and takes out a sealed packet of tools.
Jeremy starts to work on the cow patty.  Chelsea steals glances when she knows Jeremy isn't looking.

JEREMY
(While working)
Did you know that the North American Indians used cow patties or buffalo patties to start their fires in the winter, but in the bible, Isaiah 5:25 it says dung was valuable and was used to heat ovens for fuel and warmth.  Bedouins still use cow and camel dung for...

Looks over at Chelsea.

JEREMY
Am I boring you?

CHELSEA
(Back to reading and not looking up.)
Yes.

JEREMY
What are you reading?

CHELSEA
I'm not reading, I am being forced to listen.

JEREMY
Okay, okay.

Jeremy continues to dissect the cow patty.  Chelsea sneaks peeks at Jeremy from behind and then when she thinks it is safe, she begins to watch Jeremy closely.  She almost moves with him as he examines the specimen, she examines him.

JEREMY
I have one, two, looks like five Onthophagus Hecate.

CHELSEA
That's common.

JEREMY
Oh, this one is rare, Onthophagus Taurus.

CHELSEA
That's not rare, that's introduced.

JEREMY
Rare to this field.

CHELSEA
Yeah.

Silence

JEREMY
I can feel that.

Chelsea sits quickly.

CHELSEA
Feel what?

JEREMY
You're watching me.

CHELSEA
No, I'm not.

JEREMY
Sure you're not.
CHELSEA
(Reading her book again.)
Record the count.

JEREMY
I'm still examining.

CHELSEA
Record when you are done.

JEREMY
I know.

Jeremy goes back to finding the beetles.  Chelsea starts to watch him again.

JEREMY
I took the train there.  Long ride.

No response.

JEREMY
Are you hungry?

Jeremy goes back to the cow patty.

JEREMY
I'm hungry.

No response.

JEREMY
I could use a falafel from Mammoons.