I was initially drawn to this because my own ongoing script project explores the lives of superVILLAINS and their minions (a mask is mandatory for most of my creations, rather like the cape here), so I was curious to see another writer's take of the same genre / the opposite side of the coin.
The relationship between Captain Cosmic and Evelyn/Cosmic Woman was very intriguing - it's not every day that you see superheroes having a domestic argument. There were interesting parallels made between being a hero and being famous - being tempted by beautiful women, etc. Evelyn seemed symbolic of a scenario that is unfortunately faced by several women - the struggle between domestic life and career. However, the fact that the career in question is more dangerous and unusual than most livened up the topic.
As for The Magician and Balloon Boy, I liked the mentoring scene very much. It was "slapsticky" and amusing, but also very heartwarming. The discussion of self-confidence was also effective in light of the ending. Balloon Boy's backstory jumped out at me because of how everyday and relateable it was. He wasn't transformed by radiation or some other extreme means, like many superheroes are - his experience has sadly been undergone by many people. To me, this made him very human indeed, but that said, all of the characters had a strong sense of realness.
And the ending? It was stark and unexpected, but powerful and moving.
I've giving this top marks because I honestly can't find fault with it. The idea is great, the piece itself is wonderful, and the format and grammar are excellent.
Hello, sir. I noticed your screenplay in the Daily Deviations (congratulations, by the way). I am a 16-year-old amateur filmmaker with Asperger's Syndrome (nothing serious, I assure you). I was wondering if you would approve of me making this into an actual short film. All credit will go to you if it is made. I understand if you don't want it to be made, I'm just asking. Thank you for your time and have a nice day.
I have to say, I enjoyed the beginning when the feel of this was a zany comedy. As I approached the middle, I was was going to comment about how it seemed to have lost some of it's steam, humor wise.
and then I got to the big reveal at the end and it all made sense... Wow! That was quite the twist. It hit me like a punch to the gut with the recognition of the truth behind the school there. Rod Serling would be proud.